I’m Polish!

Someone just pointed at me (to laugh at someone who couldn’t read something) and said, “He’s Polish and he can read better than you!”

I thought this was some sort of private joke, like a Family Guy reference or something, but no, someone has apparently been spreading rumours that I am Polish.

It was fun while it lasted. For a moment, I almost believed it myself. It was like I caught a glimpse of what life would have been like if I was Polish, and gentlemen — it was sweet. Just think of all the things that would have been different had it been true:

  1. I would have been Polish
  2. I wouldn’t have been English

I think that’s all I need to say.

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4 Comments

  • jake (the poacher0 says:

    my comments are twain

    1) there is a “polish-mexican” bistro in Shepherd’s Market, London.

    2) there is a “polish-italian” restaraunt in Stroud, Gloucestershire.

  • Mark says:

    Twain — good word.

  • MQ says:

    All depends on whether the word ‘comment’ is a masculine noun. I think that’s what I learned in my Middle High German lectures. Twain is the last remaining evidence that English grammar once had three-way gender like in German. Apparently.

  • Mark says:

    I love it. Grammar and etymology. They’re like, married. I want to learn Icelandic, that’s my ambition.