Being Mr. Kenny

I was sharing a taxi with some straight boys a few weeks ago, and one of them began reminiscing about some girl he had once seen, and about how lovely her breasts were.

My interest in breasts ended about the same time I started eating solid foods, but I’ve always felt pressured to make some sort of contribution to these discussions. Usually I’ll say something like “Oh, I’m more of a man’s man myself” hoping that they catch my drift, but in this particular discussion I spied a chance to make an excellent pun.

I said, wistfully, “Memories… Mammaries!”

Now, surely this must be the wittiest pun ever to be uttered in the history of gay men in taxis, but I didn’t get a response. They didn’t even have the decency to stare at me blankly!

Well, let me tell you, that’s the last time I ever indulge in witticisms whilst using public transport. The last time, I say!