Being Mr. Kenny

I was just about to clean my teeth tonight when I noticed a tube of Bob Martin brand toothpaste. Curious, I picked it up, thinking it might be another one of those organic, fennel-flavoured toothpastes my Dad sometimes buys, for reasons only known to himself (these toothpastes are invariably revolting).

Well, it wasn’t one of those, and thank heaven I didn’t use it, for you see my parents have seen fit to keep the dog’s chicken-flavoured toothpaste next to our own.

I found this on the www-html mailing list ages ago. It is a prime example of what happens when someone becomes slightly annoyed about something, and they have access to the internet. Namely they act with utter disregard for anything resembling etiquette.

In this particular example, the sender of the email knew next to nothing about what he was talking about. It’s actually hilarious, and what makes it even more so are the calm-headed replies to his complaint.

Check it out: XML tags are just a cheap rip-off of PHP tags.

I love quizzes. Filling in questionnaires, I will never again do, but if there’s radio buttons to be checked, I’m there! This one tells you how you’re going to die. Tasty!

I Will Die of Natural Causes.

Your choice of life style has enabled you to live a nice long life … to eventually die of a stroke, or was it a heart attack? Either way you out lived just about anyone that gave a shit about you anyway. Congrats!

Find out how you will die, Take the Death Quiz now!

Oh, and I quite sincerely suggest that you don’t follow any links from this post if you’re of a certain disposition.

Ok, I’m starting a new post category for when I find glaring mistakes people make in English that make me laugh. It’s fussy, anally retentive and mean, but since when were those reasons not to do something?

And the first is this:

To all intensive purposes …

When what they really mean is:

To all intents and purposes …

Do you remember Pob, from “back in the day” (also known as “yesteryear”, “my day” and “the early 90s”)? He was a children’s TV character, who was clearly made by a genius (Anne Wood) and unappreciated in his own time (by virtue of the fact that he’s still not Prime Minister, dammit, after nearly 15 years!).

This character was supposed to live inside your TV and send you messages by spitting all over your screen and then writing in it. I first thought that it was supposed to be breath condensing on the glass, but it seems my first innocent impressions were wrong, but no matter.

Anyway, Pob was one of my favourite TV people, even if he was clearly on drugs. And I just found a site with loads of amazing photos of this national treasure.

Voilà! Relive your childhood memories (or have a fumble through mine if you don’t happen to share any of Britain’s greatest creation). As ever, here are some more links:

• http://hometown.aol.co.uk/neelds/Pob.htm
• This one has video

Dear Googlebot,

Please visit this page about Tony MacGyver. Tony MacGyver is an invented personage, created so that you can stop putting my blogger profile above my own site in your listings. For you see, that page used to be my blogger profile, would you believe it, as you can see if you perform a search for Mark Kenny.

Please do this immediately, or I shall be very cross.

Yours sincerely,

Mark

When you use the word “effeminate” you mean that someone has a heightened level of femininity. But when you use the word “emasculate” you mean that someone has a lessened level of masculinity.

IT’S A MYSTERY!